Bizarre Love Triangle
by wannabeme07
Summary: Because ours was one bizarre love triangle


You didn't know it but I saw you that day. You were standing by the shadows, pain evident in your face. I can tell you were trying very hard not to break down as you watch his hands caress my face ever so gently. I know you wished that you were in my place instead; how you wish that he would look at you the same way. I know, I understand, because I too am in your place. I know how you feel, because oh how I wish that you would look at me the same way that you would look at him. How I want to run to you, pull you close, hold you in my arms and wipe that smile off your face; the smile that you'd put up to hide your pain, But I couldn't, because I know I am a coward. I couldn't risk the thought of others talking behind my back. I couldn't risk my reputation; I couldn't go against what society expects of me. And maybe that's the reason why I fell in love with you Syusuke. Being with you reminds me that sometimes, I don't have to think too much. You remind me that despite what people think of me, I am only human. You remind me that despite all my responsibilities, I am only a high school boy. I fell in love with you because of that. But how ironic is that no matter what I achieve, no matter how hard I work to get what I want, there is still one thing that can never be mine, and that is you. No matter how perfect people may see me, my life would never be perfect without you. But I can't have you. I don't want to force you to love me, because I know you chose not to love me. You fell in love with him and I cannot chance that. Instead, here I am standing here, loving you from a far. No matter what happens I will continue to love you, I will continue to love a boy who will never be mine. And no matter how hard it is, no matter how painful it is, I won't ever stop.

* * *

I know I have you, physically, yes, I do. But I know your heart is still with him. I still don't understand, why did you choose to be with me in the first place when you obviously still love him. Still, I am glad. I am thankful that I have you bit I know your heart is his. No matter what I do, I will always be second in your heart, and it hurts. It hurts Kunimitsu. Why can't I make you look at me the same way you look at him? What should I do to make you love me the same way you love him? Every time you'd gaze tenderly at me, I can still see the pain hidden behind your eyes. I may be young but I am not dense, nor stupid. I know that each time you'd caress my face, each time you'd hold me tight in your embrace, each time you'd press your lips against mine, I know that deep inside, you wish he was in my place instead. I know I should let you go; and that it's best for me to set you free. Free to love whoever you choose to love, but I don't think I can do that. I am not strong enough to let you go. I know that you're happier with him, but I don't think I could bear not having you with me. I know I'm selfish and that I'm hurting the two of us with my actions, but I don't know what else to do. I don't know how to let you go, but I also know that I am not the one that will make you truly happy. No matter how hard I try, I just can't win against him. Is that fair Kunimitsu? I don't think so, but life isn't fair, is it? No matter how hard I try, I just can't make you fall in love with me. And it hurts, a lot. You're too busy loving him from afar; you just can't seem to notice me loving you so ever dear. All I want is your you to learn how to love me as well. I know that in time, if you would just give me one chance, I know, you'd fall in love with me too. Is that too much to ask?

* * *

I saw you that night, and you were happy. I know that you're happy with him, I can tell, but it hurts. It hurts seeing you so happy, and it's not because of me but it's because of him. I know I should get used to it, because you've already chose him over me. I know that you love him, you love him a lot, but tell you what Ryoma, even if you chose him, I will never stop loving you. Even if we were to be reborn, and we'd be in the same situation all over again, I will still choose you. No matter how many times you'd chose him over me, it will never stop me from loving you. No matter how many times, I will never get tired of giving you my heart. I will always be waiting for you Ryoma. No matter how long, I will always be here, waiting, hoping, praying that maybe, just maybe, even for just a single moment, you'd spare me a loving look as well. No matter how many times you'd push me away, I will still come back because that's who I am. I'm merely a fool who's helplessly in love with you. No matter how many times people call me a genius, I'm still a fool for you. I'll keep waiting for you, I'll never give up, I'll never stop waiting, longing, hoping, for that one chance that you'd spare me a glance; hoping that maybe one day, you'd decide to give me a chance. Because it's you whom I truly love. I will never get tired. No matter how long it would take, I will wait. With each glace you send him, each touch, each kiss, it may cause me pain, but I know that because it's you, it's all worth it. But even if after all this time, even if you'd end up choosing him over me, over and over again, if that will make you happy, so be it. Because it's you. Because I love you, and I cannot bear to see you unhappy. Even if it causes me so much pain, no matter how hard, if it will make you happy, then so be it.


End file.
